When the heart doesn't tell the truth, Pain will give the answer.

1. Crush, Get out of my head and come into my life instead.

2. Crush, I wish I could tell you how I feel because you are all I think about when I go to bed.

3. Crush, No, I'm not scared to tell you that I like you, just scared of your reaction when I tell you.

4. Crush, You make me smile and you don't even know it.

5. Crush, Every time I talk to you I get a smile on my face that just won't go away.

6. Crush, Every time I look at my phone and I see I have a text from you, I get a really big smile on my face.

7. Crush, should I keeping my distance? because I am afraid to get close and get hurt again, do I follow my heart or do I protect it?

8. Crush, I hope you know that i'm thinking about you every second of every minute of every hour of every day of every year.

9. Crush, Would you follow me if i walked away?

10. Crush, I love you... Don't ever question that.

11. Crush, I hate admitting it but I really do miss you.

12. Crush, I feel really happy when I see you, because when I look at you and see your smile, it also makes me have a smile.

13. Crush, Yes, I flirt. But once I'm yours, I'm yours. I'll stay committed to you, and only you. No one else.

14. Crush, Whenever you need me..., I'll be there for you.

15. That awkward moment when we both look at each other from across the room at the same time, then look away.

mampu tulis

Assalamualaikum w.b.t.

Setelah dihitung masa ketika waktu dan tempat, kesimpulannya lebih kurang seminggu nda update blog ni. Terlalu sibuk dengan urusan *LAH SANGAT haha. guaa lagi dirumah yang tidak berwifi didalamnya 

Maka, pada hari ini aku mau update la sesuka hati kepala hotak aku. Mengarut kan? HAHAHA. Sebenarnya nda tau mau update apa, tetapi tatap juga gatal ni tangan mau menaip kan. ISHK3. Hari ni terasa mau mencabar diri pula. MENAIP TANPA BACKSPACE. ok start!

sebenarnya aku nda tau mau taip apa, tapi aku akan taip uga bagi menengok error sangatkah aku searang. hahaha. nampak suda typo disitu. memang nda senonoh kan. kalua mau teruskan baca, baca kasi paham, dan kalau terselit perkataan atau bahasa brunei ka apa, maklum sendiri la k. aui ni memang orang brunei. apa aku melalut ni? haha. aku just mau ceritapasal aku pegi orang kawin tadi kot. uiseh. cakap kehel ba aku sekarang. maka orang sabah juga kan. haha. *typo semakin kurang**bangga wooo** setakat ni, perasaan aku pegi orang kawin agak berkurangan, panas, ramai, sesak, erghhh maemang nda suka betul dengan seituasi macam tu. makeup luntur jo. macam tadi la, panas ja hati aku menengok orang lalu, mun lawa bisai, ani adeh. erabajk <----- apa tu? hahahaha. memang ternyata aku nda campin lagi dengan board lappy ni. maka aku buka pun sebba mau tengok runningman seja ba. tu la pasal. aku dlagi belum sambung study, jadi janrang la guna lappy ni. lappy usang, maklum, acer ja. mampu milik kan. ainnla apple ka apa/ haha. bongok la ba typo ni. merata ba pula, patul la dipanggil ratu typo aku -_- *&&%T&^(*^$%%# <----- BENGANG

Situasi 2

apahal pila situasi dua segala ni kan. ala. buat ja paham k. aku saja ja tu au kasi panjang2 entry. kakaka. sengaja k sengaja. sukahati aku la, aku punya bloh, kalau jeles, tulis sendiri la. paham? kalau maun mencarut aku juga, flyingkick, knockout, MAU? cis. panas la ba pula hati au sekarang. tetiba emo kan. maklum. usia semakin lanjut, emosil pun kurang stabil.. haha. mengaruttttt lagi jo. sdisana la memang nda bengam otak sama hati. ortak bolang MATURE, hati bilang, SANTAI KAU JO. ISTEDI. aapa la tu? hahaha/,.yayayaya. typo berplesetan <-- setan? hahaha. bpleseran y benarnya. erghh. ternyata la ba juga akiu ni selalau salah bila menaip kan./// nyah apa ja aku taip ni. segala simbiol ba keliuar. haha.. <---- maliu bila baca sendiri. kakaka

situasi 3

apa la konon ma dirtulias di siytuasi 2 eh 3 ni. ishh. slaah la ba juga menaopip <-- apa ni? hahaha. bengang aku bengang yang amattttt. maluba juga aku bila menaip salah ni. ahh sudahla. mungkin sesiapa baca ni nmemang akan nampak aku guaiala <--- error yang amat #*((^&$$$&* -_- kisah la jugak aku kan.  everyone mesti ada CRAZY SIDE dia kan. alaahh. jangan mau munafik la cakap ko orang nda macam ni. memang dasar musnafik kan. biasa la. mau tunjuk side PERFECT konon, maka LESS LESS LESS LESS LESS perfect kan? mengaku nda? nda kan? haha. saja ja tu beremosi. ahh. sudahlah untuk harini. malas aku mau menaoiop seabab aku malas la. sudah berhenti. berhentii. berhenti. last2 ni kurang typo kan? haha. okbai.

Rilekskan minda dengan ini. :p

WHY SO SERIOUS.

KPOP dan seangkatan dengannya

DULU . . .

KPOP? Ntah apaapa ntah. seksi. Gediks. Lelaki suka ahh tengok perempuan seksi macam tu. Yang pompuan ni pulak gedik lah suka bagai dengan artis lelaki acah-2 perempuan kat youtube segala macam tu. ISH! blablabla

SEKARANG . . .

KPOP? Aku layan gak ahh drama best best kat maaduu. Runningman best wo! Aku minat gila dekat gary. Hensem gila koootttt. Hampir semua episod aku ada! LAWAK! LAWAK! LAWAK! blablablablabla

REALITY seorang remaja. Aku nda la minat SEMUA pasal pasal KPOP ni. Aku layan runningman je kooottttt. kecohh aahh. Drama THE MASTER'S SUN. Kalau kau orang tanya aku pasal KPOP segala macam ni, aku tak tau pun. HAHAHA. ohh pelis lah jangan gediks. kahkahkah. Ni mau kecoh sikit pasal episod dalam dua benda yang aku suka tengok ni :)

Runningman episod 162 [Full Episode]

The Master's Sun Episod 6

Well. Aku ni nda la FANATIK KABABOM sm segala korea ni. Kadang, kita minat sesuatu tu disebabkan ianya ada TERKAIT sikit dengan hidup kita. KAN? Alah! Jangan pretend nda tau k, dilarang munafik disini. HAHAHA. Macam lagu juga, kalau kecewa, layan JIWANG PARAH. Bila gembira, JIWANG BUNGA. Memang ntah apaapa kan? Oh duniawi. HAHAHAHA. 

KBAI. *makan OREO*

Teen

Buktikan Jika ANDA seorang REMAJA! cute macam saya. HAHAHAHAHAHA. K PERASAN :P

1. Anda suka untuk berbelanja TAPI tidak suka guna duit sendiri.

2. Anda suka orang lain jaga hati dan perasaan anda TAPI tak pernah kisah pun pasal hati dan perasaan orang lain.

3. Anda suka MATIKAN handphone bila gaduh dengan boifren yang tak seberapa nak hensem tu. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

4. Bila parents suruh buat sumting, taknak. Bila BUAYA DARAT alias boipren kau orang tu suruh, AMBOI ! Laju kalah kereta F1 aku kate kauuuu. KAN? Jangan nak bajet suci kat sini k. :p

5. Bila sedih, marah, suka sangat nak update kat facebook aku pun sebenarnya mcm ni, tapi korang lagi TERUK ! k bai ! haha Tak malu eh nak maki-maki? ehh pelis lah -_-

6. Suka JUDGE salah orang, WALHAL salah sendiri macam GUNUNG KINABALU tu tak nampak pulak kan? 

7. Suka dengan GADGET-2 MAHAL, lepas tu showoff depan orang. Pretend text dengan orang tapi sebenarnya MOTIF cuma nak tayang gadget. oh pelis. Annoying k.

8. Bajet HOT.

9. Suka HANG OUT dengan kengkawan WALAUPUN tiada duit. Ntah apaapa ntah just duduk and round-2 dekat MALL. kahkahkah. 

10. 80% menunjukkan REMAJA ssuka hati aku je nak letak nombor apa HAHA MEMANG TIDAK SUKA DENGAN KENYATAAN YANG BENAR PASAL DIRINYA. Acah acah perfect. puiikkk -_-

11. Cepat penat dan malas. Aku dah malas nak type. SO berhenti membebel.

Belajarlah terima kenyataan. HAHAHAHAHA >.<

The Old me AND The New ME

Assalamualaikum W.B.T.
Those previous ENTRY yang telah dicoret lah sangat, HAHA tu semua just for kenangan semata. Cis. Sentimental pula kan? *gedikss* ohh whatever. Pada jam 4.26 PM bertarikh 24 October 2013, aku telah bertekad untuk menulis entry yang tak berapa nak penting ni. So kalau mau baca, baca. HATERS are not allowed. Terima Kasih.

Lately aku dah start mendalami hidup sebagai wanita hahahaha. sebelum ni bukan wanita, sebelum ni masih budak-2 hingusan. ahh LANTAK lah apa pun maksudnya -_- *emo tetiba*.Aku dah start berjinak dengan pelbagai buku resipi. Macam susah nak percaya, tapi itulah kenyataannya. Aku ni nda la pandai masak, kadang-kadang FAIL. sebenarnya SELALU -_- Walaupun begitu, aku tetap gagahkan hatiku untuk tidak berputus asa. hah! apa pasal skema semacam ni? hahaha.


Tanpa membuang masa dan segala waktunya, maka BETA ehh ttibe :p nak share la sedikit sebanyak berjuta k over skett, haha tentang resipi yang pernah beta laksanakan. Antaranya yang senang-2 ja. Yang small de matter bilang orang2. cari ja di google, Youtube utk tutorial. ahh. apa dah aku melalut ni. haha. Tengok Gambar je lah k. Check it out babe.

Memang tak berapa nak senonoh kan apam POLKADOT *lah sangat* ni. haha. my first try :)

Dah lawa dah sekarang. Amacam, EXPERT kan? *angkat-2 kening. HAHAHA.

 Beside, aku ada gak try a few recipe of cake.

Ni kek ntah apa kebenda ntah namanya ni. lupa :(

Cake ni KHAS for my newborn niece. MIA, love u muahhhh ! >.<

Ni cake choc moist. Sedap ka nda? Suka-suka gue dong! HAHAHA

HAH! Ni cake pertama yang telah dihasilkan. kek Vanilla. *apesal gambar ni kat bawah -_-

Ni Marble Cake *lah sangat* tak jadi sebenarnya, alah. At least, aku cuba buat kan? wehuuu!

Banyal lagi kot resipi yang aku sudah cuba. And most of them, ehemm. Faham-2 la. GAGAL MENJADI letew. hahaha. *gediks disitu*Ahhh. pedulikan semua tu, Thanks for my family yang selalu bagi semangat mau try semua kek, apam dan sebagainya tu. Walaupun xsedap, dorang still makan. Thanks for appreciate apa yang aku buat. tak faham sebab tetiba sentimental pulakk, huh! drama petang-2 yang biasaa ditonton di TV! haha. Selain tu ada gak ahh aku try buat puding and etc. Baru minggu lepas sebenarnya try buat. Tapi malangnya gambar tu tiada dalam LAPPY. wkwkwkwk. so, ndapayah mau sibuk tengok. HIHI.

Okay, dah selesai membebel. HAHA.

TYPO ERROR AMATLAH DIKESALI.

A Little Love, for my BELOVED

DESCRIBE myself.

Real Name: Noora Farah Deva Binti Jukra
Nickname: Adeq/fara/noora/deva/dey/far/yayah/d
Zodiac sign: Sagittarius
Male/Female: Pondan Female HAHAHAHA. pondan :p
Elementary School: Sk Kukuro (99-05) lebih setahun sebab sy darjah 1 dua kali :p SMK Kota Klias (06-07) SMK Bongawan (08) SMK Beaufort (09-10) SMK Bongawan (11-12)
High School: High School Musical tipu disitu :p HAHAHA
Hair Colour: Black+Dark Brown
Tall or Short: or. Thats mean sy tak tinggi, tak rendah. HAHAHA. tak mengaku rendah -_- 158cm  :)
Phone or Camera: BOTH !
Do you have a crush on someone: YES!
Eat or Drink: *soalan apa ni*

Have you ever ...

Been in an airplane: What do you think? tanya balik pulakk. pun boleh kan :p Alhamdulillah pernah :)
Been in relationship: YES
Been in accident: Alhamdulillah, Allah masih menjaga sy. Belum pernah >.<

Thanks for reading :)

D . E . A . D

Assalamualaikum W.B.T

UPU results just been announced. OH GOD. Like usual, saya berlagak seperti orang kaya yang mampu buat SEGALANYA! CLAP YOUR HAND FOR ME PLEASE.

"93121312**** Dukacita dimaklumkan anda tidak berjaya ditawarkan tempat ke IPTA."

I'm so proud of myself!!!!! I'm offended! Insult me as long as you can. Poeple doesn't want to know your sacrifies, they want to know your SUCCESSFULL.What a jerk. Imma kick your head if i got a chance.

Rayuan just have been sent successfully. I dont even hope. God willing, Kalau rezeki, ada la kan. kalau tiada? I'm from a rich family *floating on BOILING WATER* HAHAHA. IPTS welcoming me. yeahhh!

I've nothing to say left. I'M DEAD. I'M SO DEAD.

Welcome RAMADHAN !

Assalamualaikum W.B.T

Welcome Ramadhan !!!! 

PUASA ! PUASA ! PUASA ! PUASA !

Bila sebut dan dengar pasal puasa, saya menjadi excited MUCH MUCH MUCH ! Best kan puasa? Teringat pulak zaman kanak-2 dulu kala. HAHA. MEMANG LAWAK. puasa macam tak puasa.

Aku start puasa since 9 tahun kalau tak silap. Biasa la puasa kanak-2 ni kan. puasa pun masih jugak aktif nak lari-2, main-2. Sentiasa bertenaga ja dulu. Rindunya puasa pada zaman kanak-2. Dulu puasa bagi pengertian diri aku, puasa ni cuma tak makan nasi + ikan + sayur + air. makanan-2 lain boleh makan. ada pula macam tu kan? HAHAHA. Pernah sekali ter-KANTOI dengan parents cuzzy sebab kami makan keropok time puasa. HAHA. makan maggie time puasa. Bila ingat balik, memang rindu nak jadi kanak-2. Lepas ter-KANTOI, terus insaf. Terus puasa penuh. HAHAHA.

Masa berlalu, dah masuk sekolah menengah. Aku sekolah menengah + tinggal di HOSTEL. Aku tak selalu sangat berbuka dengan family ni. Jadi bila berkesempatan nak berbuka, aku pun memanfaatkan kesempatan yang ada. HIHI. Memang diakui, bersahur dan berbuka di hostel sangat jauh berbeza dengan keadaan dalam rumah.

Di hostel, boleh nampak macam-2 ragam adik-2 yang baru belajar puasa. rindu sangat nak masuk hostel balik. Di hostel juga la, aku belajar bangun sahur sendiri, dan yang paling BEST, kawan-2 non-muslim pula ada yang bangunkan aku sahur. Dorang memang terbaik laaa! Sahur di hostel berbeza sangat. Makan dengan kawan-2, adik-2, kakak-2. Memang best. Waktu berbuka pun sama juga. Setiap petang keluar ke bazaar ramai-2. Daily MENU ialah MARTABAK AYAM+DAGING. perghhhh. sebulan makan benda tu, memang tak pernah nak puasss. sedap sangatttt. HAHA.

Setiap malam mesti ada TARAWIH kan? Pernah sekali SKIP rakaat last tarawih tu, skip witir. HAHA. boleh-2 tertangkap pulak oleh warden. HAHAHA. Terus didenda. Lepas tu tak insaf-2 lagi. Masih jugak SKIP-2 rakaat. And pernah sekali ESCAPE tarawih, duduk-2 makan kuih kat dorm. Lepas tu dengar bunyi  yang menakutkan, terus tak escape dah. Semua tu dah lama berlalu, time form 3 kalau tak silap. HIHI.

Banyak pengalaman kat hostel, aku pernah menjalani sebagai orang yang paling muda di hostel, dan of course paling KAKAK dalam hostel. Last year, batch STPM 2012, aku satu-2nya KAKAK UPPER 6 muslim dalam hostel. Budak-2 suka harapkan aku jalankan apa-2 aktiviti masa puasa. Memang diakui la aku ni tak berapa sangat dalam bidang agama, tak jahil. Aku belum mempunyai keyakinan nak sampaikan sesuatu yang serius. Lebih-2 lagi soal agama. Jadi aku serahkan dekat adik form 5 kat dalam hostel tu. Dia tu kira Assistant aku lah. Memandangkan aku terlalu sibuk dengan assignment yang tertunda, maka MASA ku di dalam surau adalah terhad. Terkadang agak sedih bila solat sendiri dalam bilik. Tapi bila berkesempatan solat bersama, tak ku sia-2kan.

Bila ingat balik, selama 20 tahun aku masih bernafas di bumi ALLAH S.W.T ini, terkadang terasa malu dengan diri sendiri. Apabila terkenangkan saudara seagama di bumi Palestin, Mesir. Malu dengan diri sendiri. Tapi apa yang mampu aku lakukan, cuma DOA yang mampu aku kirimkan. Berharap penindasan terhadap mereka segera dihentikan. AMIN :')

Semoga Ramadhan kali ini, aku mampu memupuk diri aku untuk jadi manusia yang lebih bersyukur, menghargai dengan nikmat ALLAH s.w.t yang telah dicurahkan kepadaku. InshaAllah.

SELAMAT MENYAMBUT BULAN RAMADHAN ! RAYA RAYA RAYA RAYA RAYA RAYA! HAHAHA.

R A N D O M

Assalamualaikum.

Day after day, week after week, month to another month. people change, environmental change, life changing. I? same as before. Not changing at all? I was actually confused with my life now. Really do not understand what I went through. I don't understand !!!!!!!

UPU result akan diumumkan pada minggu kedua bulan JULAI !!! Next week loh :( terrifying week for STPM 2012 students. Stress! Hopefully, permohonan aku ke IPTA diterima. I don't care la mana-2 IPTA pun aku bole jalan. Asal IPTA, aku okay ja. Course? kalau dapat sejarah, struggle la. HAHA. Nauzubillah min zallik, kalau permohonan ditolak, rayuan ditolak, makanya aku akan meneruskan pengajian di IPTS la nampaknya. InshaAllah kalau tiada halangan, sambung study di Unitar. God willing :)

LIFE. Right from the start, you were a thief, you stole my heart. AND I WAS YOUR WILLING VICTIM. Hahaha. lagu pula kan? lagu ni express my feeling, actually. so? Listen it yourself.

Entry kali ini, tak panjang mana. R A N D O M from my mind.

You, Me, and Our PAST.

Assalamualaikum and have a wonderful wednesday.

I quite rarely make entries lately. There is nothing that I want to share. But today, I want to share about something that has happened in my life that made ​​me aware of some of life. For me this is very important. I do not expect people will read what I write. I do not force. I would like to share through writing than speaking directly to anyone. This entry may like the drama that often in TV, but this is the truth. I tell the truth.

5 years ago, I have met with a generally good person in my sight. I have known him in the previous two years, but I was a bit embarrassed to greets. He is actually a good friend to my brother. Classmates actually. I will not tell you all the time, seconds, inches from our first sight. I'll talk generally. Here the story begins.

He was perfect in my eyes, has the features I want. I love what is in him. handsome? He is not handsome like any celebrity. He is handsome as himself. He's shy. Courteous. All I want to have is on him. That is why I think he was perfect.

I was transferred to the another school by my mother. I do not want to be transferred, but what's my to my parents objected to the requirement. I finally did. I was then 15 years old, he was 17 years old. Two years difference does not pose any problem for me. I am happy with him.

Until the time, came a man in my life, steal my heart. I left him alone. I without feeling left him with many questions. Until I let down by the new men present today. I went back to him, he received me with open regardless of that over the years I have left him. How well his heart. I do not know what I was thinking at the time. I too chase appearance. Teenage love. I left him for the second times. But this time, I confess that my heart was stolen by someone else. He agreed. I left him without feeling. how sick his heart at that moment. How awful I am.

We meet after several years, I came across him when he was working. I was shocked. He just smiled at me and I return his smile. I do not think that day was the last day I saw him. two weeks pass, I was told that he had died due to an accident when he was going to work. I was shocked.

I do not think that he died at a young age. But who we are to determine life and death. Only God knows every single scene. I think this could be retaliation on me due to leave him first. I'm sorry. I  don't know what should I do. I have many sins to him. I don't have time to apologize to him. When through the street where he was an accident, I feel sad.

Dan sekarang saya hanya mampu untuk mengirimkan doa kepadanya disetiap sujud, disetiap solat yang saya laksanakan kerana saya sudah terlambat untuk meminta maaf. 30 JUNE 2012-30 JUNE 2013. Sudah setahun dia pergi meninggalkan kami. Namanya, wajahnya, senyumannya, perangainya masih segar dalam ingatan. Al-Fatihah kepada Mohd Fadhli Bin Jani :')

Moral of the story, Sayangi sesiapa sahaja yang menyayangi kita. Hargai sesiapa sahaja yang berada di sisi kita. Sayangi Allah terutamanya, sayangi keluarga, kawan, saudara dan sesiapa sahaja yang berada disekeliling kita sebelum semuanya terlambat. Sesal kemudian tidak berguna kan? Jadikan kisah saya sebagai pengajaran.

I'm always looking at your facebook account when I missed you.

"Memendam Cinta" atau "Cinta Ditolak"

Assalamualaikum.

Happy weekend everyone. Lama tak post entry. Agak sibuk dengan hal sendiri lately. Hari ni just post something which always running in my mind. Agak mengganggu juga la. Hati tak tenang. hanya mampu bersabar.

Did you see tittle post ni? "memendam cinta" atau "cinta ditolak".. actually, post ni bukan la berkaitan sangat dengan tajuk tu. agak offside sikit. so? abaikan la. maybe akan ada perkara yang akan terkait, tak banyak mana. apa apa pun, ignore sahaja lah. Tittle tu pun dapat dari WAYANG yang ditonton tadi pagi. HAHA!

I don't care lah kalau Entry kali ni offside jatuh gaung, keluar padang, mati ditembak M-16 ka apa. aku just post. mau baca, baca. xmau baca, JANGAN BACA.

start with my study, HOPE sangat dapat continue DEGREE. bulan 7 ni keluar result UPU. took so long to proceed. UPU OH UPU. please be nice with me. okay? saya berharappp.

KERJA? SPA8 pilihan utama. kerja dulu and then sambung study pun boleh kan. tapi aura study tu dah kurang, maklum la masih muda. bila dah pegang duit, malas pula mau study trus kan? huh. entah la people. apa la mau jadi sama aku sekarang ni. terumbang ambing dijalan yang rata. nasib :(

LIFE? hidup masih berjalan seperti biasa. seperti hari-2 sebelumnya. Tak kisah lah badai apa pun menimpa, hidup kena teruskan juga. mana boleh PAUSE, STOP, REWIND segala kan? so, face it bravely. Setakat ni saya menjadi penganggur, dalam masa yang sama menjadi babysitter yang sangat rajin. WAKAKAKA. laugh for me. saya sudah rajin ye sekarang. tak macam dulu lagi.

LOVE. Its complicated. every relationship is complicated. tiada satu pun yang xcomplicated kan. saya meneruskan zaman bujang dengan gembira. saya cuba melupakan semua yang menghantui selama ni. cuba mengurangkan stress dengan meminta nasihat yang lebih matang. Saya kini in love dengan WeChat, Whatsapp, Twitter, POU dan sebagainya. application tu semua yang menggembirakan hari-2 ku kini. Nda kisah la orang mau judge apa sekarang. saya sudah tidak kisah.

Last, HATI? tiada yang harus dibicarakan tentang hati. Hati masih dikabat sama besi. Saya memang tidak romantik kepada sesiapa yang tidak berhak, tapi saya sweet kepada yang berhak. Saya layak mencintai seseorang yang boleh mencintai saya dan terima saya apa adanya, boleh lindungi saya meskipun dari keluarganya sendiri. saya berhak memilih seseorang yang saya anggap sesuai untuk saya. Tapi, kita sebagai manusia, hanya mampu merancang, tuhan ALLAH S.W.T sahaja yang menentukan.

Saya ingin mencari bakal suami, bukan mencari bakal boyfriend yang cuma tahu KEGEMBIRAAN SAYA, tapi tidak tahu KEDUKAAN SAYA.

At Least, LEARN SOMETHING

Learn something from the experience. I am very fortunate to have such a life like this. My heart was broken? Not even a little. HAHA. I'm a tough person, I'm strong to face the reality. I do not need anyone to depend on except my family and my closest friends. I am familiar with the challenges of life. I've said before, I don't like when my heart is disturbed. yes, I do not like at all. But who cares if my heart will be disturbed? I only feel it, I just would face. only ME.

I'm comfortable with my life now. no restraints, no encumbrances, no obligations. HAHAHAHA. I am very excited to lead the next day. I live only accompanied by my family, my closest friends, and I'm very pleased with it. I was young, I did not love my life burdened by other people. And now, I will be more involved in matters of religion, God willing, not preferred world.

You know what's really exciting me? I'm happy to see that my life may pass freely. That is my dream. I dream of a very good life without restrictions from anyone. I love being part to be loved, but not by way of censure. I love all the people understand me and care about me, but not everything in my life they need to know. I have privacy. I have to guard my privacy no matter what happens.

While talk about life, I'm also not ready to have a serious relationship. yes, I'm really interested in someone but I do not think I can give my heart to him. as I said before, I'm just interested, not fall in love. Interested and fall in love is a different matter. I do not have a partner, and that does not mean I'm desperate for a pair. You all should know that. I will go through life without a partner as long as I can, as long as I don't meet my true love, I will continue to maintain this kind of life.

"Forget what hurt you in the past, BUT never forget what it taught you."

Fighting for RIGHTS

ADAM ADLI. Mahasiswa UPSI. Mengapa dia ditahan? Ucapan berapi Adam Adli di pentas anjuran SAMM dan SMM 13 Mei lalu telah membawa kepada penahanan beliau di Bangsar Utama. Adam Adli telah dibawa ke Balai Polis Jinjang atas dakwaan akta hasutan dan kemudian disumbat ke dalam lokap dan direman selama 5 hari di Lokap Berpusat Kuala Lumpur di Jinjang. SAMM bersama hampir 100 aktivis rakyat telah berkumpul dan menunjukkan solidariti terhadap Adam Adli di hadapan lokap yang dihuni oleh Adam.

Hasutan? Suara RAKYAT suara KERAMAT. Sekian lama, DEMOCRACY IN MALAYSIA IS DEAD. Demokrasi apa namanya kalau suara rakyat dibidas? Ehh Come on la MALAYSIAN, dengarkan suara MAJORITI baru ini. Dulunya dianggap suara Minoriti, kini telah bangkit sebagai suara majoriti seramai 5.5 juta rakyat malaysia.

DSAI MERUPAKAN MASTER MIND KEPADA MAHASISWA UNTUK MERUSUH DI JALANAN? Any statement will come with evidence. PROVE it? Someone? DSAI cuma membangkitkan semangat anak muda untuk menegakkan keadilan, dan mengembalikan hak serta demokrasi yang telah dicuri oleh UMNO BN. Why perhimpunan BERSIH dianggap HARAM? Why perhimpunan di Stadium KELANA JAYA dianggap HARAM? Why are all connected with the opposition considered illegal? TELL me why it called ILLEGAL?

Something goes wrong to the government. Why there is nothing goes to Zahid Hamidi while he was invite sedition when ordered people to leave the country if they do not agree with the 'death of democracy'. OHH. HE is under control of UMNO BN. Although Adam Adli arrested, it does not directly weaken the movement by Adam Adli called the movement into the road, but the colonial-style action ministry is sure to drive millions of people to come to Kuala Lumpur in the near future. The more you hit people, the more people the courage mounting.

Majority of the people want a new government, but unfortunately for this country when people stolen victory in the name of false democracy. It's time the people rise up to not wait another 5 years for 55-year wait is too long, it's time the people's uprising. Suara Rakyat Suara Keramat!! You catch Adam Adli, a thousand more will be born as Adam Adli who made the same call.

Anwar Ibrahim is considered to have created a racial issue, has incited students to make riot in the streets, is that true? only fools and simply follow the dictates of BN UMNO will believe. Whos the one who create racial issue? "what the Chinese want?" Who else if not the government that has the power to control the media.

PR can only make a peaceful rally in the streets. why is it considered illegal? This is because the government does not want young people down rise to the claim that democracy is dead in Malaysia. Blocked media for PR, this is also part of a fake democracy run by BN UMNO? Anwar accused has produced students who oppose the government. Students rallied for their rights, to demand what they deserve. This is not about Anwar's not about Adam Adli, this is because the people rise up to demand their rights, not for fun.

IF Anwar was produce students against the government, the government gave rise to what? Those who ignore religion? too glorify the leader? those who only know to slander? ENOUGH.

SUPPORT SAMM, SUPPORT ADAM ADLI.

Am I Selfish?

Being MYSELF is the important part in my LIFE. Am I selfish being in that way? huh people? You insult me, you ignore me, you doesn't appreciate me, I can face it. I can HANDLE it, dear people. But don't you dare to OPEN YOUR MOUTH and say I'm selfish just because I'm being myself. Ignore me IF you think I'm DISTURBING your life. EH HELLO? siapa DISTURB siapa?

"Rumors are carried by HATERS. Spread by FOOLS. And accepted by IDIOTS". 

Don't say I'm a selfish. You know my story NOT every inch of my life. So please don't say any words, even one word if you don't know me well. My friends told me, Negative were always negative. Yes DEAR, absolutely true. Haters is ONE OF THE NEGATIVE CHARGE. I must kick it out from my life. Yes, I'm not mature enough to face my life. SO? do you mature enough? Think about yourself, makes your dream come true, have a great job, in that time YOU can "SHOW OFF" in front of me. We're same. 20 years old. why huh mesti berperangai begitu. Sama juga masih belum further study. Stop lah.

My surrounded is filled by love from my family, my friends. So? Apa yang salah disitu? Ada MINDA, BUKA. Jangan mau fikir benda negatif ja. Jangan mau cari silap orang saja. Jika difikir balik, We're good friends long time ago. Why mau bermusuh? I'm completely not understand. People can change. People can be FAKE. I don't care. As long dorang tak kacau my life, I'm okay with that. thats why its called "LIFE", we are exploring a new journey in our life, trying something new, facing something that we never expected. Accepted it.  Face it. You're not going anywhere if you always run away of your problems.

And now, WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM exactly? you got my number. Call me.

My World, My SUNSHINE ♥

Good EVENING and have a wonderful weekend people ♥

Sharing IS caring. HAHAHAHA. I'm not thinking Sharing is caring. sometimes la. Describe something about me. I'm telling everyone and it will never be OVER of my Privacy. MY WORLD, MY SUNSHINE. there are my BELOVED FAMILY, fellow friends, and everyone who deserve MY LIMITED EDITION LOVE. HAHA. JOKES. FAMILY. Consist of 7 Siblings. 1 mom and 1 dad. BIG FAMILY? NO.

MY MOM

There is my lovely siblings.

My WORLD!
Its 6? I'm the last one >.<

She's the one Who live in my life, I've Live in her life. Its been so long. since we are 6. I love her like I love myself, my family. WHO IS SHE. THERE SHE IS. She always there when I need. She is so beautiful in and outside. Perfect friends for me. She is funny. Kind. All I need is her sincerity towards me. Shes never complained while i'm always bullying her, HAHA. When we are spending some time each other, going somewhere each other, people will thought we are SIBLING. WHY OHH? sama ka muka? HAHAHA. She is soooo sweet. I LOVE HER SO MUCH.

my BESTIE since 6.

SOLO GROUP. CONSIST OF 4 MEMBERS. (We Called the one who doesn't have a COUPLE, "berbadi". LOL. how dare ohh.

S-SIMPLE

O-OBEY

L-LEADER

O-OBSESS

Me Myself. Atirah, Anisah, Hidayah

my MrsNONGS. consist of 8 members. My bestie at BONGAWAN. they are very sweet and beautiful. and ALL of them was TAKEN. HAHA. thats why its called MRS. here they are.

BiBi, Liah, kak Nasha, Mira, Nonoy, Deekay, Yana. like ALWAYS, I'm not in the picture. HAHA

They are the people who brightening MY DAYS. Thanks a lot for being there when I need. I love the way that you treat me. I love EVERYTHING ABOUT THEM :) THEY ARE MY WORLD, MY SUNSHINE ♥

Thinking OUTSIDE THE LINE

MATURED? COOL? UNDERSTANDING? VALUABLE? CARING? SPECIAL? IN LOVE?

I'm not matured enough. I'm not cool enough. I'm not understanding enough. So? I don't have the criteria that you want. WHY want to wait ANY LONGER? go lahhh. I've decided my own life. STOP telling me what I'm willing to do.

Itu bukanlah yang ingin di SHARE sebenarnya. HAHAHA. biasaaaa. MUQADIMMAH mesti suspen (ntah suspen ka x). so? do I care? ohhhh. absolutely NO ler. What we're gonna discuss in this site tonight? HEART? FEELINGS? FAMILY? FRIENDS? LOVE maybe? decided to SHARE about Education. LOL.

Further STUDY?

ohhh. HOPE SO. God willing InshaAllah. Universiti Malaysia SABAH FOR ME maybe? HAHA. Don't hope too much, you will HURT too much OKAY. LOOKING for a new journey is too HARD for me. decided to continue on BACHELOR tapii result ni OVER GEMPAK. 4P in STPM tak menjanjikan apa-2. Its ALL about NASIB. kekuatan doa, selalu doa, InshaAllah dimakbulkan. RIGHT? Why UPU took soo long to proceed huh? NERVOUS ok NERVOUS ! UPSI MedSi? not choosen AT ALL ? ohh my. Maybe the government knows that I'm truely supporting PAKATAN RAKYAT, so that government pun reject AKU la? HAHAHA. Nauzubillah. Give some HOPE lah! Even ONCE.

UPSI memang dah sah-2 lepas lah. Jangan nak mengharap sangat keyh? LOL for me. I'm applying IJAZAH SARJANA MUDA PENDIDIKAN (GEOGRAFI) DENGAN KEPUJIAN di UPSI. 1 da cancel. ada lagi 7. InshaAllah sangkut la antara satu ni keyhh... Doakan saya :)

UMS adalah pilihan utama. Apply 3 course, one of them mestilah ada subject GEOGRAPHY. MY favourite one.  GEOGRAFI, SEJARAH, PSIKOLOGI KANAK-KANAK DAN KELUARGA. Mungkin time aku Apply, aku ada amnesia sikit. how come aku boleh pilih SEJARAH, ohhhh. itu lah satu subject yang paling aku BENGANG -_- HAHA. amnesia amnesia sekejap. Kalau lah ditakdirkan dapat course SEJARAH di UMS? bekakai jooo. HAHAHA. InshaAllah akan diusaha juga la ba tu sikit-2.

UiTM? my second CHOICE. Applying Degree in PERANCANGAN BANDAR DAN WILAYAH and Degree PENGURUSAN PELANCONGAN. Hope sangkut lah perancangan bandar tu. HAHAHA. ada juga knowledge sikit pasal hal-2 begitu. bukan mau kata EXPERT, cuma minat lebih sikit dalam bidang tu.

If takdapat antara dua pilihan diatas, aku juga apply Degree in PENGURUSAN SUMBER MANUSIA di UUM and Degree in KEUSAHAWANAN (HOSPITALITI) di UMK. terbang ke kelantan lah kalau dapat UMK sayang oiii. tapi buat masa ni, STAY-2 SABAH dulu. negeri tercinta kan? HAHAHA. takut homesick ja. puas la jauh-2 dari family. HAISHHH.

Last word, aku berharap dan berdoa aku dapat sambung belajar lagi. Aku tak mau la study sampai STPM ja. RUGI ohh. UMS UiTM, please BE NICE with me OKAY? JANGAN JAHAT-2 MAU REJECT-2. HAHA.

♥ WISH ME ALL THE BEST ♥ ◕‿◕ ◕‿◕ ◕‿◕ 

Something NONSENSE

FACEBOOK? TWITTER? HAVE IT?

something nonsense goes to youth. WHY? I dont know lah. why laman sosial like FACEBOOK tu selalu menjadi amarah ku. While benda tu tak ganggu aku even 1 inch tapi dia ganggu HATI AKU ! And aku tak suka HATI aku diganggu.

Pernah tak nampak di newsfeed kamu, something like this:

"JANGAN ganggu boipreng titeww, jangan nak menggatal dengan boipreng titewww. TITEW sayang sangad kat dia. *Gelpreng USING* " 

" Di fren list kamo ada nama dia **** ****** ka? kalau ada, dia aku punya. milik aku sorang, jangan kamo mau menggatal sama dia" *HACKED by LAKI*

HAHAHA. Believe OR not, benda kecil macam ni pun aku boleh sakit hati. OHHH remaja. sedar lah! tak kemana nya pun Gelpreng/bini/datin/laki/baby USING kamu tu? why mesti PAMERKAN hubungan kamu depan orang lain sedangkan hubungan belum sah?  fikir-fikirkan lah~

Ohh mungkin, orang-2 yang berkelakuan nonsense tu akan cakap "suka hati aku la nak buat status macam mana! remove ja la kalau tak suka".. ehh HELLO! siapa yang add  siapa? tak kuasa aku nak remove kau. kau add, kau la remove. HAHAHA.

PRIVASI? tiada privasi ehh dalam hidup? Perkara ni bukan berlaku dalam kalangan remaja ja sebenarnya, even orang umur 24 and above pun masih main permainan HACKED MENGHACKED account kekasihnya.   APA MOTIFNYA?

"saya cuma nak tahu sama ada dia CURANG atau TIDAK, APA SALAHNYA?"

HEY BOYS AND GIRLS, kalau dia nak curang, dia curang jugakk. tak payah pun nak guna facebook or laman sosial yang lain. Its based on their HEART! kalau hati dah kata nak curang, curang jugak la weii. Dalam hubungan ni, kita bukan nak kongsi SEMUA dengan pasangan kita. mana ada LIFE kalau semua nak kongsi kan? fikir-2 la. bukan dan tidak semestinya, pasangan kita hari ni tu SUAMI/ISTERI kita nanti. kalau dah jodoh, Alhamdulillah. kalau bukan jodoh?

Kita tak tahu apa yang ada dalam hati seseorang. Orang boleh berubah sekelip mata. Cuba fikir, Kalau dia ada niat jahat nak UPLOAD masuk apa-2 sahaja yang menjadi privasi kita? lepas tu kita nak kata apa? MERAYU-RAYU supaya di DELETE? Ingat SEMUDAH petik jari ka?

So, SIMPAN apa-apa yang SANGAT PENTING, SHARE apa yang boleh di SHARE. InshaAllah hidup akan tenang.

"GIVE, but do not ALLOW YOURSELF to be USED. LOVE, but do not ALLOW YOUR HEART to de ABUSED. TRUST, but do not NAIVE. LISTEN TO OTHERS, but do not LOSE YOURSELF".

Feel FREE to WRITE

Smile. Smile as long as you can. Masalah jika dibiarkan bermain-main di minda, memang kita takkan kemana. Just think positive. everyone have their own problems. Handle it nicely.
feel free? YES I'M SURE. letting someone walk away from your life is not EASY.
learn to be a strong person. means, be a strong person with heartless, never go down if there are someone who will bring you down. just ignore that ANASIR-2 luar. they just NOT COMFORTABLE with our life. so let it be. they will PENAT SENDIRI, all people in my surrounding tell me like this.

"kita kalau mau berubah, jangan khuatir jika ada yang tak suka. Memang akan ada segelintir yang tak akan suka. JADI kita jangan mengalah. Kena Face the risk. "

Today, 15/05/2013, I don't know what my heart goes to be? i'm hearthless MAYBE? my heart broken into a million pieces. am I wrong ?? my friends that i thought care, understand me, its not understand ME sangat la. oh myy, "rapuh" perasaan aku ni.

Ya ALLAH, yang mengetahui segala yang berjalan masuk dan keluar dalam hidupku, berikan aku petunjuk yang benar jika aku berada di jalan yang salah. Kuatkan hati ku jika aku lemah. 

I'm doing the right thing right now. I don't want any person in my life get HURT because of ME. I'm letting they go not because i dont care anymore. I just want they think about their life too. Dont just HOPING on me. I'm not an angel. I'm NOBODY. I'm the person who have A LOT OF SINS. so dont hoping on me. I cant give anyone HAPPIENESS, I have nothing.

Dont blame me IF i'm wrong, i'm a person too. the person who not exclude with any fault. I'm trying to be myself. You can ignore me IF you think If i'm wrong. I'M JUST WANT TO BE MYSELF, WANT TO GET INTO MYSELF ON MY OWN.

"Kalau kita BERUBAH untuk jadi baik kepada ALLAH, Allah akan hantar orang yang baik untuk bersama-sama kita."

InshaALLAH ~
NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE.

True OR False?

DSAI. Datuk Seri Anwar Ibrahim.Siapa dia? Kenapa Ramai yang mengelabah jika dia bersuara?

Saya sebagai rakyat yang menyokong perjuangan beliau sangat sebak apabila mendengar isu fitnah yang dilemparkan keatas beliau NAMUN beliau masih tetap utuh menghadapi segala tomahan yang dilemparkan. Allahuakhbar. betapa sabarnya hati hamba Allah ini. 

Saya seringkali mendengar MACAI berkata, "buat apa anda mempertahankan ANWAR IBRAHIM?"

dan saya menjawab, "Untuk apa anda pertahankan NAJIB RAZAK?". Saya, mahupun baru berusia 20 tahun pada 2013 ini sudah terbuka mata di atas perjuangan yang DSAI jalankan. Saya berfikir, belia semuda saya sudah bangkit untuk menyokong perjuangan beliau, adakah orang yang lebih tua dari saya tidak dapat NAMPAK dan BERFIKIR SECARA RASIONAL tentang pemimpin ini? atau mereka membutakan mata mereka untuk mengelak daripada melihat kebenaran ini? Wallahualam.

Tok Guru Nik Aziz (TGNA), juga menasihati DSAI, tak ramai yang menjalani apa yang ANWAR jalani. "Jika suatu hari nanti, kamu (anwar) ditakdirkan memimpin negara MALAYSIA dan dapat menawan PUTRAJAYA, jangan biar seorang pun daripada rakyatmu menderita seperti apa yang pernah kau jalani. JAGALAH MEREKA SEPERTI ANAK-ANAKMU SENDIRI, INSHAALLAH KAMU (ANWAR) AKAN MENJADI PEMIMPIN YANG BAIK".

sedangkan TGNA sebagai seorang ULAMA lagi yakin bahawa DSAI tidak bersalah dalam isu LIWAT, PENYELEWENGAN, apa lagi kita yang jahil dari hukum agama ini hendak menghukum beliau. sedarlah MALAYSIAN, DSAI berjuang untuk rakyat. Untuk mengembalikan MARUAH dan KEMULIAAN rakyat yang telah dicuri oleh kerajaan sekarang. Saya tidak berkata saya membenci NAJIB RAZAK DAN BARISAN NASIONAL, saya cuma tidak bersetuju cara pentadbiran yang mereka jalankan. 

MACAI berkata, "KALAU TIDAK SUKA DENGAN PENTADBIRAN PERDANA MENTERI, SILA CARI NEGARA LAIN UNTUK BERLINDUNG!" Ya Allah, Bumi ini MILIK ALLAH, kita sebagai HAMBANYA, ADAKAH LAYAK untuk berkata sedemikian? Wallahualam. Apabila orang FASIK dipilih menjadi pemerintah negara, ia merupakan salah satu tanda kiamat. Nauzubillah.